Sharing Is Caring

‘Cảm ơn’ Viet-nam (‘Thank you’ Viet-nam)

Fifteen years ago, when I briefly visited Vietnam for work purposes, I made myself the promise to go back one day and discover the country. I felt at peace. The landscapes, the food,  the welcoming smiles and optimism of hard working Vietnamese people was an invitation that burnt itself into my heart.

Recently, I spent two insightful weeks traveling across the country, thoroughly enjoying every single day which was filled by fantastic tales accompanying the cities and historical sights. 

However, my mind was hijacked by the simplicity of life in the rural parts of Hanoi. The fact that the journey unfolded through a kind, knowledgeable and experienced guide, called Hieu, was not lost on me. Hieu has been a guide in Vietnam all his life and spoke several languages perfectly.  He has never stepped out of his country. His patriotism and his firm belief in solidarity of his people was contagious.   I left Vietnam, wondering once we have overcome adversity, how much would we voluntarily share with each other, without the need to boast about it and seek public recognition?

Here are a few examples that led me to this question:

Imagine this scene - you are in a van, on a road which is just wide enough to let two cars pass by. It's noon. The Vietnamese childrens are spotted in their school uniform with a red scarf around their neck, beaming and waving to any tourist as they cycle to get home for lunch and daily siesta. The sides of the road are occupied by crops (mainly rice) which have been laid out to dry. For many homes these would be their personal ration for the year. The van driver habitually and efficiently makes room for the bikes, the opposite car coming, the chicken that is crossing the road nonchalantly and miraculously does not drive over any crop!  As I was holding my breath in anticipation, I noticed the owner of the rice swaying in his hammock alongside the road, chewing on a toothpick at the side of his mouth and not even raising an eyebrow!

Me: “Hieu, how come they leave all the crops on the road?”

Hieu: “This is the mountain part. They don't have any other place that is flat. They need the crop to dry and have to turn them often to avoid any dampness. Don't worry, we are careful. We respect each other.”

With such chaotic roads I wondered how loud: “Is insurance mandatory here?”

Hieu: “Yes. But, we don't rely on it.  We don't call the police because it doesn't solve anything.  We have to wait many many months and even then it's about connections.”  

Me: “So, in case of an accident, how do you figure out who is at fault?”

Hieu:  “If there is an accident the richer one will pay for the poorer one.  It's not a question of who is right or who is at fault. We support each other.”

As we continue we reach a small town.  Many fields have artificial ponds to grow fish for family consumption. Everything seems to be openly shared. 

Hieu: “In these villages the neighbours are like a family.  No one would steal anything, because they all know each other.  Like brothers and sisters. We are compassionate.”

As we continue for the first time, I find a door with a lock.

Me: “There is a big lock on the doors of this house!”

Hieu explains that the house belongs to a wealthy well known family.  He looks at the lock pensively, and as he holds it up, with a big grin he says: “loss of wealth is the fear of the rich.” 

Once we got to the main city, Hieu pointed to a narrow corridor that leads to a small compartment that is shared amongst several families. It's hard to imagine how so many people can live in such a small space. 

Me: “So where do they cook?”

Hieu: “They don't, they all eat outside.  This is why street food is popular and you find such a variety, both in terms of price as well as type of food.  They basically wake up and leave the house and only come back at night, when it's time to sleep.” 

Me: “They spend the whole day outdoors?! But what about the older ones?”

Hieu: “They also stay outdoors and chat. This is why you see them, wash the small area where they will set up a stall on the street, and then they sit there chatting and making business.”

Me: “So they need to care about the cleanliness of the street, because in reality that's their business?”

Hieu:  “Yes, we are interdependent on each other and each person has a specific role in the family. We have to take care of each other for the system to work.”

Irrespective of the level of income and standards of living, people didn't hesitate to give and share.  I found myself entwined into their simple and warm world. As Hieu went the extra mile for us, we found ourselves caring a great deal about him and in turn wishing to illustrate our appreciation of him. 

• Personal

  • How does living a simpler life impact community support and human bonding?

  • If tomorrow you chose to slow life down, what effect would it have on your level of appreciation?

• Parenting:

  • How can we best influence the future generation to be invested in the collective good as opposed to individual performance?

• Organisation:

  • In an organisation, what influences collective growth vs individual ambitions? 

”A good person can make another person good; it means that goodness will elicit goodness in the society; other persons will also be good.”

- Bhumibol Adulyadej